Mormon-themed restaurant chain

Rumor has it that there is an idea floating around out there for a chain
of non-pretentious Mormon-themed restaurants called The Steak Center
(Where There's Never a Dry, Boring Meat-ing!).

Each Steak Center will have one enormous dining area with basketball
hoops at either end and folding metal chairs and long tables covered in
plastic tablecloths. The Steak Centers will not have hostesses, but
greeters. Men in their seventies will meet you at the door and talk like
they have known you all your life.

The main menu items will be: Porterhouse Rockwell Steak, Primary Rib and
the Poor Wayfaring Pan of Beef, garnished with Parsley P. Pratt Funeral
Potatoes. They will also have, when it's in season, Eliza R. Snow crab.
And let's not forget a whole line of "And It Came to Pasta", including
Kraft MacaMoroni and Cheese.

Additionally, they'll have breakfast items, including Pearls of Great
Rice and Frosted Minivans, as well as Adam-ondi-Omelettes. Also
available, "In Our Lovely Desserts", including fast sundaes, Gadianton
cobbler and the sinful Laman Meringue Pie.

The waiters will be 12- and 13-year-old boys wearing white shirts and
their fathers' ties. At the end of the night the customers will be asked
to help fold up the chairs and tables and vacuum the floor.
Franchises are selling faster than Sunbeams on Skittles! Get yours while
they last!